I was faced with the question “why do we not pursue our dreams” the other day and it got me to thinking (Thank you, Connie!).
So many of us have this deep, dark secret that we hide from the rest of the “real” world – that we really want to do “X” or be “Y” but we are afraid to admit it.
I think there may be many reasons we hide our dreams …
Maybe we think admitting our secret desire will “jinx” our dream?
Maybe, if we say what we want out loud others will judge us or laugh at us?
Maybe admitting what we want might make it real and then we would have to do it and risk failure?
Maybe admitting our dream is just too overwhelming to even think about?
Maybe we really don’t feel we are deserving of such a great dream?
Maybe we don’t know how to go about it so we keep it hidden away until it magically happens on its own?
There could be any number of reasons… but I think it all boils down to fear.
Fear is a very powerful stopper. But everyone has fears. The trick is to work through those fears. There are ways to overcome fear – to help ourselves to move through our fears. Once we get through that fear once, the next time is so much easier.
Here are a few helpful tips:
- Concentrate on your “Why” instead of focusing on your fear. If your why is strong enough, the fear will pale in comparison. If you had to do whatever you are afraid of to save a loved one from danger you know you’d do it without hesitation. That may be an extreme example – but it proves the point.
- Make the “Fear” more palatable. The same thing I say about making yourself do something you really don’t want to do…make it better by adding a reward or using a crutch. There are times when I make a function or an appointment much more fun by taking a friend with me or by treating myself to a gourmet coffee to sip along the way.
- Take a closer look. Find out more about whatever you fear. Do your research. You may find out that you are blowing the fear up into a massive monster when it is really just a little pesky bug that you could easily squash. For instance, having to hire a web designer and pay thousands for a super website scares many into not pursuing a website, but in reality, there are so many other options to go with that are inexpensive and highly attractive. But who knew?
Whatever your fear is, don’t let it stop you. Start whatever you are dreaming about with little baby steps. First admit it to yourself and then admit it to someone you can trust.
What a wonderful relief it can be to just share that deep dark secret with someone else.
Maybe your confidante can even help you! You never know until you try. So take a deep breath and stick a toe in the water. You don’t have to jump in all at once. But a toe is a great start and could lead to an ankle. Soon you are happily dog paddling around and wondering why you didn’t try this sooner!
